Monday, August 29, 2011

Guest Post & Giveaway with Nadia Lee

Today I want to welcome Nadia Lee. 

Fated: You and I Are Meant to Be Forever

In paranormal romance, the fated mate trope is almost a clich√© now. How many times have we seen a couple meet, feel instant lust and decide that they're fated to be together forever?  (The fated mate realization is usually on the part of the male, who then chases the female around.)

I understand the appeal of the scenario. There's something very thrilling about a powerful man doing everything he can to claim a woman and make an everlasting commitment

But in many books I'm not sure why the couple should spend even a minute together, much less marry.  The hero and heroine have nothing in common, they don't seem particularly empathetic, and aren't even nice to each other.  Some of them have such a dysfunctional relationship that I feel like they belong on Jerry Springer. However, because the couple is fated, the readers are asked to swallow the unbelievable relationship.

A skilled writer can make me believe that, fated or not, the couple belongs together.  When such a writer uses the fated mate trope, the resulting story is cracktastic.  I can believe that the couple will be happy forever, and that their relationship will endure whatever difficulties and hardship they may face together in the future.

So what makes me buy into the fated mate trope?  The biggest one is shared values.  When the hero and heroine both place importance on things such as honesty, loyalty, families and/or generosity, etc. it signals that there's more than just lust between the two. That in turn makes me believe that the couple has a solid foundation for a relationship.

How about you? What makes you buy into the fated mate trope?  Answer for your chance to win an e-copy of any one of my current releases plus an early author e-copy of The Last Slayer (December 26, 2011, Carina Press).


About Nadia Lee:

Bilingual former management consultant Nadia Lee has lived in four different countries and enjoyed many adventures and excellent food around the globe. In the last eight years, she has kissed stingrays, got bitten by a shark, ridden an elephant and petted tigers.

She shares an apartment overlooking a river and palm trees in Japan with her husband, winter white hamsters and an ever-widening pile of books. When she's not writing, she can be found digging through old Asian historical texts or planning another trip.

 Visit Nadia here


  1. Great post, Nadia! I agree that the fated mate thing only works when the writing is strong. I think part of the fate appeal comes from the fact that it takes all of the "work" out of the relationship. Everyone wants that Poof! moment even though it's totally unrealistic. Personally, I like to read about characters who have a bumpy road and come together after many trials and tribulations. It makes the HEA so much more satisfying.

  2. So true. I like when there's no first-sight love. I love when the characters have so many obstacles on their way and they fall in love, knowing each other perfectly. When they develope a relationship with time, not in 1 or 2 days. And there has to be a little bit of sexual tension!

    Lissette_125 AT hotmail DOT com

  3. I don't believe in love at first sight or fate but the idea of a fated mate or when they imprint is very appealing. You don't have any doubt that your with the right/wrong person, their so in love there will probly be no cheating and well, their happy. And I do love it when it's the male doing all the chasing ;-)But of course thats more of a real life wish. In my books, I still like it when the guy does the chasing but, I like for there to be obstacles, suspense and trill!

  4. Great post! I like the idea of fated mates...I guess it's because I'd like to believe that everyone has that one person that they can really connect with and who you can fully trust. I think life is hard enough - why not make the relationship part easier in fiction:)


  5. I think it's the idea that there's a perfect someone out there. I don't think it's realistic, but I enjoy reading about it.

  6. It depends on what type of story I am reading. If it is a novel length story, I like it to take longer before the couple fall in love, with maybe one falling and having to chase/convince the other. In shorter stories, more love at first sight or quickly after is ok because there isn't alot of time to waste.
    manning_j2004 at yahoo dot com

  7. Not entering the giveaway, but wanted to say this was a great guest post! I love fated matches, especially the cursed fated matches-and I'm not sure why.

  8. Hi, Nadia.
    I agree with Amanda that this setup only works if the writing is strong. i've read some God awful books where it is laughable that this couple gets together - there's no chemistry and the femail can be shrill -who would really want her. Conversely, the men can be dopes and still the female swoons! But, having said that, when it is written well, I can get transported into their story and wish that some hot, Alpha male will fall madly in love with me and pursue me until I must say "yes" to his offer of HEA!
    Thanks for the giveaway and good question!
    msmjb65 AT gmail DOT com

  9. I love the idea of the fated mate but I hate it when an author uses it because it makes the whole "you are my mate" thing in a story a little easier to explain. I mean, maybe the dude is just weird and calls the woman he wants a mate! But, when it is woven into a good paranormal then I love it. And when the couple fights the forced mate idea because they want "choice" then it can cause some really great tension!

  10. Great Post! I agree with pretty much everything everyone else said!

    The only time I don't care for the "fated mate" trope is when it is an excuse to allow the hero to act possessive and domineering. It's the explanation for why the man has reverted to cave man behavior. I also don't like when the author then makes the heroine basically roll over and take it. When there are genuine, believable reasons for the couple to be together (in their world/setting) or the couple can be together "equally" without (usually the woman) one or the other giving up too much or becoming submissive, then I enjoy it.

    Thanks for the giveaway!


  11. I agree that shared values is one of the important aspects to convince me of 'fated love'. It would also work too if at first the hero and heroine seem nothing alike or are at odds with each other, but as time goes on, they discover that they have aspects in common or are really compatible or complementary to each other because this gives the main believable foundation to convince me why they fall in love.


  12. I am not a fan of fated mates in general. Especially since it is 99% of the time the male who decides that the woman is his mate. He just claims her as his and follows her around until she accepts her fate. What's the difference between this and an unwanted arranged or forced marriage? I guess you could say it's all the craftsmanship - and many PNR authors do do it well - but it always seems to me like the woman has little choice in the matter, and the sociologist in me wonders WHY women would find that storyline attractive. *shrugs*

    Someone needs to write a story where the woman decides the man is her mate, forces him into a corner, and makes him walk her down the aisle. :)

    outredgeous at gmail dot com

  13. Amanda -- I agree about the work. Also it takes work out of the writing process because the author does not have to think about why & how the couple falls in love.

    Lissette -- I think the time is interesting. I tend to write books that take place in a very short period of time. I'll have to think about this since I'm not sure if more time necessarily makes it easier for a couple to fall in love / get to know each other better.

    Heather -- Yes, taking the uncertainty out of the relationship and knowing that the person you're with is your soul mate are very appealing in the fated mate trope. :-)

    Maria -- Escapist fiction at its best? :-D

    acm05 -- No, it's probably not realistic, hence the trope is usually found in paranormal romance. But you're not alone in enjoying it since it's so popular.

    June -- Interesting. Do you find the fated mate trope in novellas just as satisfying as in novels?

    A Buckeye Girl Reads -- Thanks for stopping by!

    msmjb65 -- I agree...! Alpha males work the best for the fated mate trope, and they're so hawt when done right.

    Jen B -- I hear ya. It makes the story unbelievable and the writer appears lazy and uncaring.

    Erin -- Oh I haven't thought about the equality aspect. I also find it annoying when the power balance is way off.

    Winnie -- A fantastic point! :-)

    Bratty -- Ohhh...then you'll love LORD OF SCOUNDRELS by Loretta Chase. The heroine shoots the hero when he refuses to marry her. :-D